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Time has passed by so swiftly, and before I knew it, I saw myself standing at a crossroad. 

This afternoon at the office, I was busy looking for something in my long-forgotten bottom drawer when I noticed my old circular box.  I opened it, and saw old pieces of what I used to call my treasures.  The box contains old receipts, movie tickets, pictures, data discs, paper flowers, withered rose petals, and love letters.  One by one, I threw them into the trash bin, each flashing memories in my head.  After a few moments, I realized that these things once made me very happy, too.  Silly, I picked them up again and returned everything inside the box that used to be busy some time ago.  Hay.  It’s funny how things that used to be very special to you could turn into little pieces of junk after some unpredicted circumstances take place.  Ganun yata talaga. But I’m glad that I have moved on.  I acknowledge that the person in my past once truly made me happy, and our memories together will never be forgotten.  They are now mere memories, and that is how they’ll forever be.  At a snail's pace, I sealed the heaving box.  Never will I open it again.

I am now about to begin a new chapter in my life, and excitement fills my veins.  Admittedly, there are still worries and fears, but I know that what’s happening now is the result of my fervent prayers.  God tells me I must not fear.  With open arms, I am welcoming a new person in my life… Yes, I am willing to trust again.  People who do not know the ordeal that I went through might find it hard to understand, they might even judge me. *frown* But that’s fine.  I am now happy, and the people who love me are happy for me.  That is what matters.

My once sunny days were hit by a storm, but the downpour is now over.  I asked God for a rainbow, and He painted it on my sky.

Standing at a crossroad, I can see the bright horizon ahead. 

Dear Lord,

I thank You for this day. I thank You for my being able to see and to hear this morning. I'm blessed because You are a forgiving God and an understanding God. You have done so much for me and You keep on blessing me.

Forgive me this day for everything I have done, said or thought that was not pleasing to You. I ask now for Your forgiveness. Please keep me safe from all danger and harm. Help me to start this day with a new attitude and plenty of gratitude. Let me make the best of each and every day to clear my mind so that I can hear from You. Please broaden my mind that I can accept all things. Let me not whine and whimper over things I have no control over. And give the best response when I'm pushed beyond my limits.

I know that when I can't pray, You listen to my heart. Continue to use me to do Your will. Continue to bless me that I may be a blessing to others. Keep me strong that I may help the weak... Keep me uplifted that I may have words of encouragement for others.

I pray for those that are lost and can't find their way. I pray for those that are misjudged and misunderstood. I pray for those who don't know You intimately. I pray for those who don't believe. But I thank you that I believe that God changes people and God changes things. I pray for all my sisters and brothers. For each and every family member in their households. I pray for peace, love and joy in their homes that they are out of debt and all their needs are met. I pray that every eye that reads this knows there is no problem, circumstance, or situation greater than God.

Every battle is in Your hands for You to fight. I pray that these words be received into the hearts of every eye that sees it. God I love you and I need you, come into my heart.

AMEN.

THE RULES:

1. Each blogger starts with ten random facts/habits about themselves.

2. Bloggers tagged need to write on their blog about their ten things and post the rules.

3. At the end of your blog you need to choose ten people you're going to tag and list their names.

4. Do not forget to comment on their site that they are tagged.

THE FACTS:

1.  GOD loves me.

2.  I’m 22, turning 23 on the 3^rd of July.

3.  I graduated from the College of Mass Communication, UP Diliman.

4.  I am in love with anything PINK.

5.  I am the Head for Advertising and Promotions of The Astra Group, Inc.

6.  I possess infectious energy. Hyperactive. Super makulit.

7.  I am scared of frogs. You can show me rats and cockroaches, but not frogs.

8.  Books excite me. They make me refuse to sleep! Dan Brown is my favorite author.

9.  I am a chocolate monster. Give me a box of Ferrero, I’d be your slave for an hour. (One hour lang! )

10. Somebody has just picked up my wrecked heart and fixed it.   888!

TAGGED PERSONS:

Cliché as this may sound, but there’s really no easy way to break somebody’s heart, especially if the hearts you’re smashing are those of your bosses who have guided and taken care of you ever since you broke away from the four corners of the classroom. 

The situation is this:  I am currently working for a private company, with the best bosses in the world.  I’ve worked with them from the time I graduated, year 2005.  Though I was very young then, they believed in me.  They taught me the nitty-gritty of the industry.  Like a baby learning to walk, they were behind me when I took my first steps.  I’ve always looked up to them as my second fathers.  They’ve always been so good to me.  After every task that they give me, they never fail to commend my job and tell me how good I am.  They boost up my confidence, and they make me want to do more and be more.  At 22, I am now the company’s Head for Advertising and Promotions; and I acknowledge the verity that if not for them and their training, I would never be able to make it here.

Everything has been running smoothly.  Then an overwhelming offer came. I’ve been asked to join a TV network where I would be the Marketing Head and Assistant to the President.  The offer has been there for over a month now, and I have to make a decision soon.  To be completely honest about it, I want to go.  I want to work for the network because this is the career path I’ve always wanted to take.  What else would be my reason for taking up Broadcast Communication if I didn’t want my profession to be in line with it? 

This is the tight spot I am now in, and I don’t know how to pull this off.  If I could only be blind and callous about how my bosses would feel, I would certainly leave.  But I don’t want to burn bridges.  I know they would be hurt when I tell them of my dilemma, they might even take it personally and be mad at me.  That’s the last thing I could take.  Plus, I love my friends in the office.  They’ve been there with me through all my post-school good times and bad times.  It’s heartbreaking to be away from them.  On the other hand, a good opportunity, like this offer, knocks only rarely.  And I have to decide which career path I really want to take while I’m young.  It’s now or never.  Haaay.

I badly need your prayers.

by Pablo Neruda

You must know that I do not love and that I love you,
because everything alive has its two sides;
a word is one wing of silence,
fire has its cold half.

I love you in order to begin to love you,
to start infinity again
and never to stop loving you:
that’s why I do not love you yet.

I love you, and I do not love you, as if I held
keys in my hand: to a future of joy-
a wretched, muddled fate-

My love has two lives, in order to love you:
that’s why I love you when I do not love you,
and also why I love you when I do.

This is a very beautiful song about friendship.   

For the 'power of four': Ate Shirley, Janina, Ate Mai, and Joycee.

Points of View

Look, it's happened once again

It happens every now and then

Feeling the hurt and hating all the men

Ready to stop it all..

I've come across this nice article on the web (http://dating.personals.yahoo.com), and I couldn't help but share it.  This might be helpful to some who are currently going through the matter under discussion.  Read on.

Don't: Call, email, text or visit your ex in a moment of weakness

Do: Ask friends for help

Don't: Second-guess your decision

Do: See your breakup for what it really is

Don't: Badmouth your ex

Do: Become a breakup rock star

"Until one morning, I'll wake up and find I'm thinking about something else and then I'll know the worst is over.  My heart might be bruised but I will recover and become capable of seeing the beauty of life once more.  It happened before, it will happen again I'm sure.  When someone leaves, it's because someone is about to arrive... I'll find love again."

                                                                  ~ Paulo Coelho, The Zahir

LORD,

Enlighten what is dark in me..

Strengthen what is weak in me..

Mend what is broken in me..

Bind what is bruised in me..

Heal what is sick in me..

Straighten what is crooked in me..

And revive whatever peace and love have died in me..

AMEN.

CLOSING CYCLES
by Paulo Coelho

One always has to know when a stage comes to an end.If we insist on staying longer than the necessary time, we lose the happiness and the meaning of the other stages we have to go through.

Closing cycles, shutting doors, ending chapters whatever name we give it, what matters is to leave in the past the moments of life that have finished. Did you lose your job? Has a loving relationship come to an end? Did you leave your parents' house? Gone to live abroad? Has a long-lasting friendship ended all of a sudden? You can spend a long time wondering why this has happened. You can tell yourself you won't take another step until you find out why certain things that were so important and so solid in your life have turned into dust, just like that. But such an attitude will be awfully stressing for everyone involved: your parents, your husband or wife, your friends, your children, your sister, everyone will be finishing chapters, turning over new leaves, getting on with life, and they will all feel bad seeing you at a standstill.

None of us can be in the present and the past at the same time, not even when we try to understand the things that happen to us. What has passed will not return: we cannot for ever be children, late adolescents, sons that feel guilt or rancor towards our parents, lovers who day and night relive an affair with someone who has gone away and has not the least intention of coming back. Things pass, and the best we can do is to let them really go away. That is why it is so important (however painful it maybe!) to destroy souvenirs, move, give lots of things away to orphanages, sell or donate the books you have at home.

Everything in this visible world is a manifestation of the invisible world, of what is going on in our hearts and getting rid of certain memories also means making some room for other memories to take their place. Let things go. Release them. Detach yourself from them. Nobody plays this life with marked cards, so sometimes we win and sometimes we lose. Do not expect anything in return, do not expect your efforts to be appreciated, your genius to be discovered, your love to be understood. Stop turning on your emotional television to watch the same program over and over again, the one that shows how much you suffered from a certain loss: that is only poisoning you, nothing else. Nothing is more dangerous than not accepting love relationships that are broken off, work that is promised but there is no starting date, decisions that are always put off waiting for the ideal moment. Before a new chapter is begun, the old one has to be finished: tell yourself that what has passed will never come back.

Remember that there was a time when you could live without that thing or that person. Nothing is irreplaceable, a habit is not a need. This may sound so obvious, it may even be difficult, but it is very important. Closing cycles. Not because of pride, incapacity or arrogance, but simply because that no longer fits your life.

Shut the door, change the record, clean the house, shake off the dust. Stop being who you were, and change into who you are.

I miss the old me... that girl that I was way back in high school, especially that girl in college. Now, I feel like I have lost my vision somehow.  My plans, my dreams, my purpose.  I remember when I was still in school, I used to tell myself that the moment I get a job and save enough resources, I would travel to places I'd never been.  I would explore.  I would see the world.  Now?  The dreams still cross my mind, but I'm always unable to do it.  I still have the heart and I now have the means to fulfill my old plans, but there's something holding me back.  I feel like there's a heavy iron ball chained around my legs, making me unable to move.  That heavy thing always gives me reasons to restrain me.  This makes me so sad.   Sometimes, I just want to forget my targets so that I can pretend to be happy.  Sometimes, I just want to avoid thinking and reflecting on my life.  But as I have noticed, that's obviously inevitable, which makes me even more frustrated.  I want to let go of the weighty object around my legs, but I feel that I cannot... all because I love "IT". I love it and I hate it.  *Sigh*

I just realized now that you really don't know what you have until you lose it.  And now that I lost something that used to fuel my passion, I feel helpless.  Now, that thing that I lost is owned by someone else, and together they continue strolling along my long forgotten path.  And me? I've been left behind.

Nobody might ever understand what I'm trying to say here.  But I just want to get it off my chest.  I want to feel better.  I know I will.

"People have scars.  In all sorts of unexpected places.  Like secret roadmaps of their personal histories. Diagrams of all their old wounds. Most of our wounds heal, leaving nothing behind but a scar. But some of them don't. Some wounds we carry with us everywhere and though the cut's long gone, the pain still lingers."

                                                --Dr. Meredith Grey

Now that we have gotten through
One more fall
I can just admit I've got it all
Cause I do..
Cause I've got you.

What could be nicer than seeing your loved one smile at you so sweetly for no reason?

What could be more flattering than hearing that someone say you look good in whatever you wear?

What could be more heartwarming than sharing with that someone an umbrella under the cold rain?

It's to hear that person say,

"I've fallen in love with you more than I planned... and now I know for sure, there's no way I'll ever let you go..."   

Put away the pictures
Put away the memories
I put over and over
Through my tears.
I've held them till I'm blind
They kept my hope alive,
As if somehow that I'd keep you here.
Once you believed in a love forevermore
How do you leave it in a drawer?

Now here it comes, the hardest part of all..
Unchain my heart that's holding on
How do I start to live my life alone?
Guess I'm just learning,
Learning the art of letting go.

Try to say it's over
Say the word goodbye.
But each time it catches in my throat
You're still here in me
And I can't set you free
So I hold on to what I wanted most
Maybe someday we'll be friends forevermore
Wish I could open up that door.

Now here it comes, the hardest part of all
Unchain my heart that's holding on
How do I start to live my life alone?
Guess I'm just learning,
Learning the art of letting go.

Watching us fade
What can I do?
But try to make it through
the pain of one more day
Without you.

Where do I start, to live my life alone?
I guess I'm learning, only learning,
Learning the art of letting go.

Know when to let go and when to walk away. If it's dead, don't go diggin' it up every five minutes to check if there's a pulse. If it's dead, walk away..

WALK AWAY.